RTT therapy and my lost writing

Last time I wrote about how I found out about RTT therapies quite by accident, and that I tried them because of the reasons I described in the very first article. Well, today I will tell you about what actually happened in the therapy and how it closes this three-article circle or triangle in an absolutely incredible way. You'll be amazed, I was too!

What is RTT therapy?

RTT therapy is a combination of hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, NLP and works with the laws of neuroscience. Practically it works like normal psychotherapy, which tries to find what from the past is influencing your current behavior. But all of this, thanks to hypnotic induction at the beginning, takes place in a state where your consciousness is "off" and you are working with your subconsciousness. (Don't get any wild ideas here. A simple method will get you into a state close to meditation. You go deeper into yourself because you've turned off that "automatic" upper layer of thoughts that runs non-stop. You are in normal touch with reality, you react, you scratch yourself if necessary 😉) Blocks are identified and you also immediately process them in your subconsciousness. After the "awakening" you discuss the whole thing a little more with the therapist and within a few days, you receive a recording, which you have to listen to for at least 21 days. This is where neuroscience comes into play, which knows that any pattern/connection in your brain can be rewritten and you use the recording to reinforce the rewriting of the patterns you started during the main therapy. Repetition and using the right words that the brain responds to is also very important in the whole process and this is where RTT draws on NLP (neuro-linguistic programming).

It's all about the fact that the brain is a complex organ, but at the same time it works on quite primitive principles and its primary task is still to ensure our survival. However, it uses "protection" methods that are often rather "harmful" in today's modern world that is based on emotion and intellect. It pushes significantly stressful and unpleasant events in our memory deep into the subconsciousness where we are unable to recall them. But these events have already formed reaction patterns in us and they are imprinted in us so firmly that they affect up to 80% of our daily lives. Moreover, as children, we experience different situations more intensely, and so perhaps our whole life is influenced by one event from childhood that seems completely banal to an adult.

Given the circumstances under which I signed up for therapy, I didn't even have any expectations. Only the intention to unblock my creative work and procrastination was clear. I was very curious to see how it would go, as I hadn't experienced any hypnosis before, and online right away. My brain is always running and I had the classic "will it work on me?" concern. It worked!

My own experience with the three stories

After being put into hypnosis, you recap your intention by listing the negatives you want to remove and what feelings it brings with it. I was already about to start crying here. Then comes the part where you have to let your brain bring up 3 events that are associated with it. I had a bit of a problem with the first one at the beginning when I started to think a little too much that something must be wrong if no image was coming to me, but Martina was great at calming me down and it took off right away. The next two stories jumped in quite automatically.

In the first story, I got to the age of about 6, when I remember the exact moment (where I was, what I was wearing, what my hairstyle was, the weather) that I did something, my parents were angry with me, and I ran away to the garden of the cottage. There were more people and children inside. I'm very confused, I don't fully understand what I did wrong, but at the same time, I don't know what to do with myself now because I'm afraid to go back inside. I am afraid of shame. All I wanted to do was go back in, but at the same time, I couldn't. I'm drowning in shame and misunderstanding. Of course, gallons of tears flow from my closed eyes and my whole body is almost in convulsions until the moment when Martina and I go over the situation in various ways, and then she tells me that this is enough, to let it go. I suddenly relax and I'm OK. It's not uncomfortable or extremely painful in any way. I feel very safe with it. The tears and the shaking just feel like something that was automatically stored in my muscles in conjunction with the memory, but emotionally I certainly don't experience the pain as deeply as I did at that moment. I know I'm somewhere else now.

I couldn't remember exactly what happened there or what I did, but that's not so important. Maybe nothing too major happened, just my little child soul got scared of something it didn't understand and it hurt a lot. But this moment was definitely somehow pivotal for me because this is exactly the same situation I ended up in a year ago when I tried the method of calling the inner child by myself. I got in touch with the same crying 6 year old who misunderstood something terribly, but without the assistance of a therapist and a thorough going-over of her emotions, I don't think I helped her.

Illustrative pic from around the time :-)

In the second story, I get to the point where after my first performance at Hip Hop Camp, I get a text message from someone who used to be supportive and a friend, even had me on his record, but the moment I start doing things my own way, everything turns around. There's a lot of shit in that text message. It's about how I embarrassed the whole "North Moravian" scene, not only with my performance but also with what I was wearing and how I have no self-reflection. I was 17, I think, and here we go again with the shame. I didn't completely repress this moment, I know it happened, but I didn't find it too crucial to pay attention to later and try to heal it. Seeing it now though, it definitely affected me that someone who was a friend and supporter at first, dropped me and humiliated me the moment I came out with my own stuff and had a big success because that's what performing at such a big festival was for me at the time for sure. It could have created many "nice patterns" for me. To not believe anyone when they compliment me, to not believe that I deserved any success, that I was making a disgrace, that my style was wrong, that I was bad, that my actions were subject to someone's control and approval, that if I did something my way I would be punished and be thrown out of the collective without support.

And then came the third story. I swear I never remembered it in my life. It was such a horrible week that it is impossible to forget, but I guess that's why my brain completely buried it. I'm about 11 years old, going to my dream horse camp. I'm pretty good at riding, but for now, I'm riding my mom's friend's horses in exchange for help in stables. He knows the guy who runs the camp and he's sending me there. Those are the main problems. I'm the youngest one there, I know the most riding-wise, and I'm occasionally talked to by the owner who asks me about his old friend and his horses. Guess what happens.

I've been the victim of hard bullying since day one. Nobody talks to me, they make fun of me, they do crazy shit to me. The peak comes one day when they take my stuff. There's a diary I've been keeping for a long time. I write about all the training sessions, the days in the stable, I write reports about the races, about the Pardubicka race, I write poems. They all gather in one room and read it all in front of everyone. 15 older people laugh at every word I've written. They targeted especially one poem about how I love horses, how I feel free with them. I beg them to stop, but it takes forever. I remember quite clearly the humiliation and the feeling that I'm still small, I don't understand things, and so what I write is embarrassing. (I have to wring out the pillow I'm lying on after therapy.)

What's ours, it will find us back

I can't believe it. How come I never thought of that? It clicked immediately. I've stopped writing since then. It's so strong that I stop Martina while I'm still in hypnosis and I want to talk it over with her. It has to come out. How I used to write a lot, actually, that I had a lot of journals, I used to write these reports about a lot of things, and that I even started a class magazine in elementary school. Not even a letter since that camp. Later on, I had the urge to start journaling again, but it always fell flat. I was quite uncomfortable writing even essays in school, and I never even got better than a C mark. When I started writing more after I had interrupted my singing career, I had an intense feeling that I was actually returning to something that might even be closer to me. Now I get it. I've always made music primarily for the message, for the lyrics anyway, singing someone else's lyrics didn't make sense to me. I guess my soul was trying to bypass my brain, which had blocked the writing, but the calling was stronger, so it took it through the music.

In therapy, you then return to the stories, talk to the people who have hurt you, comfort your little self, show it how you are today, let some of it grow inside you, and maybe keep some of it as a reminder of those moments, but with a positive view of them. More like a motivator. My ponytailed Kačenka in her gymnastics tracksuit turns into a little laughing cheerleader, takes my diary out of those bitches' hands and we go back to read it together. We wink at each other every time I publish an article or post now.

Is RTT a miracle?

It is and it isn't. It is miraculous in making the shortcut through the subconsciousness. In ordinary psychotherapy sessions, you can spend a lot of time analyzing what you think is the problem, when the problem may lie deep inside you in something else you don't remember. As I suggested, a very trained individual might be able to come close to similar results in meditation, for example, but for me, the intervention and direction of an experienced therapist were crucial and healed maybe 100% on the first try. RTT is a concentration of the best and most effective of the 30+ years of practice of Marisa Peer, the UK's top therapist not only of celebrities and top athletes.

But no therapy in the world will save your life. You have to do your work yourself. It's not like I magically stopped scrolling through my feed when I'm supposed to be working, or that a million dollars article and video ideas are going to start falling on my head right away. But a lot has changed. I fill my daily to-do list to 90% on average, and when I'm writing or creating, I don't even think about how people will react to it anymore, what it might look like from the outside, or whether it's awkward. I'm not putting myself down. This was still pretty foreign to me just in December. Because when you stop attacking yourself in the process of creating, you let your creativity run wild and allow all the new and original ideas to come. You're more authentic, people trust you and are impressed because they want to feel it too. I allow myself to feel good when someone writes something nice to me and I trust them. Plus, I suddenly got a few reactions to my writing and I realized it was exactly the feedback and understanding I was waiting for in music. But it never came, and now I know why.

I can't tell you how happy I was when I found out I was selected to study RTT therapy. It just all fell into place and in a year or so I will be using this method to help anyone who is ready to move on and take back their power over their lives

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Thanks for reading, I'd be very grateful for sharing the article and if you have any more questions on the topic, I'd love to chat with you.